Dead Parrot

[hiker]

Found this and had to post it in honor of DP....

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Dead Parrot!

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At dawn the telephone rings, 'Hello, Senor Rod? This is Ernesto, the caretaker at your country house.'

'Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?'

'Um, I am just calling to advise you, Senor Rod, that your parrot, he is dead.'

'My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?'

'Si, Senor, that's the one.'

'Damm! Thats a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird. What did he die from?'

'From eating the rotten meat, Senor Rod.'

'Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?'

'Nobody, Senor. He ate the meat of the dead horse.'

'Dead horse? What dead horse?'

'The thoroughbred, Senor Rod.'

'My prize thoroughbred is dead?'

'Yes Senor Rod, he died from all that work pulling the water cart.'

'Are you insane?? What water cart?'

'The one we used to put out the fire, Senor.'

'Good Lord!! What fire are you talking about, man??'

The one at your house, Senor! A candle fell and the curtains caught fire.'

'What the hell?? Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of a candle??!!'

'Yes, Senor Rod.'

'But there's electricity at the house! What was the candle for?'

'For the funeral, Senor Rod.'

'WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL??!!'

'Your wife's, Senor Rod', she showed up very late one night and I thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Taylor Made R11 driver'

SILENCE................... LONG SILENCE.....................

'Ernesto, if you put one scratch on my new golf club, your going to be in deep, deep shit!'

[Dead Parrot]

HA!!!! Glad to see the man has such good taste...and has his priorities in proper order.

Thank you hiker, I raise my glass of Brandy in your general direction.

DP

[hiker]

The original was told with some sort of gun instead of the golf club. I, of course, had to add the "hiker" touch by substituting with a golf club.